Monday, March 8, 2010

Week 9 2010 / It's going to be Okay...

Week 9 2010:
Week’s Running totals: 44
Running Total for 2010: 383.45

Weight training: 2
Swim: zero (um, that's three weeks and no swimming. I’ll blame this week on Tara
:) )

I’m sitting at my desk at work, it’s 9:00a.m. That’s 11:00a.m. Boston time ....at exactly this time in exactly 6 weeks, I figure I'll be about mile 4 into Boston.

Surely I'm not the only one that does this, look at the clock at various (massive) times of the day, week, and month and start a countdown of where I'll be during a race!!?? I guess it helps get the mindset ready for the task as hand for all the hard work we've done.

My training started out with a bang at the beginning of the year. I made a plan, a mighty ambitious one, and was bound determined it was not going to defeat me. I went to Boston last year feeling well-prepared, but little did I know I wasn't. I found out at the top of the infamous Heart Break Hill that I had a lot more work to get myself ready and vowed I'd be back in much better condition this year. I started the year out on a roll feeling great, running strong, with some awesome speed work.

I guess sometimes someone has other plans for us. In my case, Mother Nature (or the germ-infested high school where I work) and her powerful pre-springtime ritual of providing Jill with heavy doses of whatever crud is out there lurking decided to take up room and board in her sinuses. And her lungs.

Frustrated. Angry. Sad. Depressed. Every downer emotion flooded my head. I’ve gained 5 lbs in my training slump. 4 weeks of prime marathon training right down the toilet. Err.

We've all been there, at least those of us that have played this game a time or twenty. There are no guarantees. That's the gamble we take, and need to accept.

I'm feeling better, finally, though not 100%. I had an extremely slow 22-miler on Saturday that helped at least boost the confidence that I *can* run 26 miles in Boston, albeit way slower than last year.

And I'm wrapping my brain around this and accepting it for what it is. Last year when I qualified, everyone under the sun that had been there and ran it told me not to race Boston, just go and "experience" all it had to offer and have a blast on the course. The cross country coach at my school, who is an incredible marathoner, told me Boston was to be experienced, not nervous about. My then-trainer told me I needed to just run it for the adventure so when I went this year, I'd know more about the course and where my weaknesses lie and could run stronger this year with the knowledge of having already run it. This "experience" scenario never sat well with me; I'm a girl who wants to perform my best if I've invested the time, energy and in Boston's case, a crap-load of money. I told him who knew what the next year would bring; yes I was already in for 2010 but there were a slew of variables that maybe wouldn't allow me to race it hard, let alone even go. I raced Boston last year and I even managed to have a blast along the way (well, aside from mile 22 when I was hurled over with major stomach cramps).

And this year will be no different. Despite losing a lot of valuable conditioning and most likely not running faster than I did last year, I was given the gift to be there and as Pre says, to give anything less is sacrificing my hard work. I guess my foresight was right, had I not raced Boston last year, I'd never be forgiving myself right now. I may not race as well as I want nor finish as fast as I know I can this year, but I will be there and I will not take it for granted. It's all going to be okay.

Ah, I’m now looking forward to it! Finally! I can tell because pre-marathon anxiety is starting to set in....

I'm going to take a new approach and turn down the quantity and up the intensity. I've proved I can run the distance, now I just gotta do a little extra speed work. I have a little time....

Right now, as I finish this post up, I'm around mile 14....and feeling damn good!!! I will finish, and I will have a blast along the way!

Run well, friends!

45 comments:

Marlene said...

Great post! I love your attitude and that is a great quote from Pre.

6 weeks til Boston already! Where does the time go??

elaine said...

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Running and living said...

I think your plan is good, about upping the speed! You really have time to get the speed back, 3 big weeks before taper! I bet you'll feel differently in a few weeks! Good luck!

ShutUpandRun said...

I can't wait to see what you do in Boston. With your attitude and drive, it will surely be a very successful race in so many ways. Glad you are feeling better!

Anne said...

I like your spirit!! I'm getting excited for you :)

Heather said...

You have a great attitude. I'm looking forward to seeing you finish out this training cycle and reading a great race report!

Melissa said...

How exciting! Love your awesome attitude!

Adam Culp (Crazy Floridian) said...

Sounds like you will really enjoy this one after sickness forced you to slow down. Don't kill yourself between now and then...just do the best you can.

misszippy said...

You have a great attitude. And don't forget, no one, and I mean no one, ever feels like they've done enough to prep for a marathon. We all get sick, we all have to miss training, etc., etc. It will all come together for you. And right about now (it's 5:30 here) in 6 weeks, you're gonna be sitting with your feet up with a beer (or beverage of choice)celebrating your accomplishment!

Julie said...

Hi Jill,
You know that I adore you and your genuine & kind spirit:) You have such a good attitude and I don't care what you say!! Lets just go with it....you will do great! You have been training to the best of your ability and I can't wait to read about your Boston adventure!! Go Jill!! I will be cheering for you every step of the way!!

Anne Marie said...

oh, you're gonna do it! I've really enjoyed reading about your journey towards the big race, and it has been a journey! All of the mental training and managing the frustration I think will actually be helpful in the race moment when it just gets really freakin' hard and you have to be w/the pain and get through it.
We're all cheering for you;-)!

NY Wolve said...

That is awesome -- 6 weeks away! And it will be warm then too. Good luck!

Teamarcia said...

I adore your intensity and that of so many who will be toeing the line come hell or high water in Hopkinton in 6 weeks. There I said it 6 weeks. Great job pulling it together and thanks so much for talking me down out of my tree. Hopefully my attitude's pitsop in the crapper will be a short one.

kilax said...

Hi Jill! I am visiting from Adam's blog, where I saw you mentioned you are from Iowa too... I am from Waterloo ;)

I totally do the same thing - "In one month it will be 'such and such'" And I have a hard time not racing every race. You do have a lot of time left to train though. Good luck! I am excited to read more about your training!

Run Jess Run said...

You will be fine!! And don't forget, you were out for 3 weeks due to cruddy-crud-crud. Keep on going!!!

Sunflower Kisses said...

I love your attitude. And I will be crossing my fingers that you will feel better soon and keep going.

Mel -Tall Mom on the Run said...

It will be here before you know it. And Taper MADNESS is just around the corner.. So bummed we dide not get to meet up

ajh said...

I love your figuring out what mile you will be on in Boston! I would be excited too. How many times have you run it? Someday I will be there!

Happy Feet 26.2 said...

My race will not be exactly what I hoped for at Boston either, but I am so excited to go and enjoy the experience. This year will be my first attempt @ Boston. So awesome!

Meg said...

Jilliette,
Yippee, you sound pumped girl! I love it! Great job on your 22...that's a mere 4 away from what you'll be doing shortly. You can SO do that. I don't think we can ever predict how a race will go but I love the way you're committing to it 100% and going for it. So, it seems like you never really lost anything while you were sick...you've gained some powerful experience and now you're going to work on the speed to get there, to the finish, faster. I've got GOOD feelings about this, Jill!
BTW, DOES EVERYONE KNOW IT IS GOING TO BE YOUR BIRTHDAY WHILE YOU"RE THERE?
JILL's FOLLOWERS: See below for a secret message...Jill! Do NOT read this:
please go to my blog to find directions on how YOU can help Jill celebrate her birthday in Boston in a BIG way!
megrunsalot.blogspot.com or click on my name above!
See you at my blog!

Megan said...

why does boston start so late? is it b/c of the cold or the tons of people?

Running Through Life said...

Your gonna do great!!

Irene said...

Yes, it WILL be OK. Oh good. I'm not the only one who looks at clocks that way. I sort of look at maps similarly. ;)

It sounds like you're on the upswing, and I hope the next 6 weeks will give you everything you need, and then some.

HappyTrails said...

Glad you are coming around - it will be all good! Ran into a guy Sunday who was out getting his 20 miler in - Boston bound. You guys are everywhere...

Velma said...

You are going to be awesome - racing is 90% mental and you have the right mindset!

Morgan said...

Thatta girl!!!! I am so happy to see this post and your renewed HOPE! You've got this!!!

Also this weekend Spike referenced Boston at least a half dozen times in terms of "and right now if this were Boston I'd be..." :)

shellyrm aka jogging stroller mama said...

6 weeks! Is that all? Boy time flies! I thought of you in my race on Saturday. I was thinking that you would really love the uplifting 'feeling' of that race. (Of course, there were loads of things that I could go on about that tried to bring me personally down BUT) trail running - and that race was REAL trail running - really made me remember I love running and not just running fast. I thought how you would love feeling that joy and setting aside your need to prove you can. I know you can do great at Boston! You don't need to worry about your pace. I hope you stay healthy and enjoy running such a big marathon just for you! I am way behind on blogs (and may not catch up ever) but I was thinking about you and I am glad to read you sound so hopeful again! *hugs*

Steel Springs said...

I love the way you're viewing this challenge and your visualization of your race!

C2Iowa said...

Well, you are back mentally. That's great. I liked the whole visualization thing. Keep up the good work and all will be good -- but you already know that fact. Godspeed.

Sherri said...

This is so exciting! I can't wait for Boston! Your going to do great! Your an amazing runner and motivator...thanks!

onelittletrigirl said...

This is such a fantastic post Jill! It is so hard not to be sad- and I cannot imagine how it feels when it is Boston! I think it is good to be honest with yourself and look at the bright side! You are going to do great, I just know it!!!

Staci Dombroski said...

You are going to do awesome!!! Way to go on your training. I am glad you are feeling better!

Psyche said...

It's a waste of time and energy to look back at what you "lost" in training. Just move forward, doing the best you can and do your best. It will be amazing:)

Glenn Jones said...

Sometimes we just have to go with the flow. At least you're qualified and got your application in before it filled up!

Thanks for the book suggestion. Got it and will dive in this week!

Kenley said...

I have no doubts in my head that you are going to rock it. Sometimes we have setbacks. It is how you deal with them that matters. Take care and I wish you the best in your continued training efforts. Run ON!

runningcommentaries said...

You're going ot have a blast no matter what. I am so very jealous you get to go! Enjoy the experience and tell us every little thing about it. Spare no detail.

Jameson said...

As discouraged as you may be you are being smart, taking breaks when you need them, and not pushing the pace when its not necessary. Keep up the good work and you will do great.

Robin said...

It will be okay. You will have an amazing time. You will appreciate the experience for what it is: time with friends, time to challenge yourself, time to dig deep. You will be awesome. And it will be okay.

Sometimes, we have to accept that THIS is where we are today....

HUGS from Orlando....

Katie A. said...

Love the finish line pick :) You are making a come back - mentally if not physically!
Huggs to you! I have the dreaded crap now and am working on being positive!

Shari said...

I am so glad you are getting excited about Boston - I'm excited FOR you! In my opinion, running through sick is like running through heat - if you can pull it off, it makes you that much stronger.

lindsay said...

I am having my own Boston "training" issues to sort through :-/ the fact of the matter is it's just another marathon, no matter how hyped up others make it. The fact that you toe the start line and triumphantly cross the finish is a feat in itself. Be proud to be amongst the crowd, no matter your time, whether or not your pr. (I am working on reinforcing all these thoughts to myself too)

Mikey B said...

I'm really excited for you and I hope you have fun there, regardless of what your finish time is. Only a select few get to run Boston, so you have already achieved what others desire. Count that blessing for what it means. Press on through the training issues and just have fun on your birthday.

Mikey B

RunnuRMark said...

I think I need to take a few lessons in being more obsessive. I'll have to start that 'I'll be at point X in the race at this time X number of days from now' bit ;)

Marathonman101108 said...

There's no doubt in my mind that you'll do fine. You seem to have everything figured out. Six weeks is still enough time to fine tune everything. I can't wait to see and some other blogging buddies run "Bawston."

Jennifer said...

Wow I am behind in my postings... I think you are way better then you know. Keep a good attitude and do the work and it will happen for you!