But who's counting? Oh, that'd be me! All day long, I looked at the clock and tried to figure out what I'd be doing at exactly that time a week from today. 8:30 (Colorado time, 10:30 Boston time): start running. 10:30: half way done. 12:30: Done. It's now 10:00pm Colorado time and what will I be doing exactly a week from now? I hope sitting in a bar having already had a few drinks with friends after finishing a very strong Boston marathon.
I had a tough 2x1 mile on the treadmill tonight and I really wondered if I could actually run 26 miles in one shot on race day. My lungs hurt and I couldn't breathe. I really do not feel the normal urgency to RUN like I typically do in a taper; you know, that feeling like you got to go run NOW and that you could run forever! Ready, set, go Jill GO!! No, I'd almost be happy if we could postpone this little race until late September. I think that may be because I have so much weighing on my mind and I just can't ever feel great before a marathon. It's just hard. 26 miles is not easy and I just wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't get so pre-race nervous that my stomach hurts so much that I can't eat right. I love the prep work for the marathon and I could go and run 26 miles tomorrow and feel good, but put a "race" in front of that 26 miles, especially any important race, and I start to panic. Rob thinks that my nutrition, or lack there-of, today was the culprit for the difficult 6:30 pace 1 milers tonight. So I'm going to try to get in the right foods tomorrow....something solid, and stick to my nutrition plan! I'll try.
I made Rob conduct a little list of neurotic race worries that are clogging my mind right now: weather (in particular, heat); hydration; sleep; nutrition; right calf cramp; left knee; race day pace; mile 20 with the infamous "hills"; race day crowds; flying; stomach problems; mysterious feet numbness; what to wear at race; whether or not to carry water (90% yes); iPod playlist; to have fun; packing; staying healthy from now until race day; letting people down with a disappointing time; getting around on the train in Boston (and finding my hotel). I think that's all but I feel like I'm missing something.....and something major. Oh, yes....the Boston "let-down." That's gotta be #1 of those things that I worry about; I can already get sad thinking about how much I will miss it upon my return if I let my mind go there for too long (so I try not to). But there's still a lot more races out there for me, and I will come back to something this fall even stronger!!!
I have been playing around with iTunes and my playlist tonight and somehow, I lost the Boston playlist I had step up. UGHHH. I think I got the songs all reloaded again. I got to figure out what orders I want the songs. I had a request from SBS to list my songs; I will do that before I leave for sure.
Rob and I talked a little about this whole "time" thing again tonight and I finally expressed that I did not want to just lolly-gag this race, and have no expecations whatsoever, like we had discussed in the past; no, I want to do well. I don't know what "well" is for a time, but I do not want to just go out and blindly run. I truly feel that I am at a peak (aside from the missing lung I swallowed last week on hills); I am really in great shape (okay, not where I wish I were but I am certainly much better conditioned and fine-tuned that ever before. For this almost 46 year old body!); I have been running very well in the past few races I've done and I want to have one more good race in me, I want to make sure that all the hard work I've put into the weight training is paying off in one more race - I want to run strong and feel great in Boston!! And after I return, I am certainly willing to start the rebuilding process from scratch, if needed, so that once fall come, I'm ready to run strong again! Yes, if there's one thing I learned from my coaching class, I cannot peak and PR at every single race. And I get that now!
So please Running Gods, give me one more run this spring in my favor next Monday and if you do, I promise to trust my training and run smart....and strong! Keep my legs cramp-less; the sun behind the clouds with temps in the 50's; the ability to sleep well in my very expensive hotel; all past stomach problems be only only that, in the past; and that I have the strength to have my common-sense intact for race decisions. And if you can do that for me, I promise I will rock in Boston!!!
This is a story of a girl who one day finally made it to the Boston Marathon....
2 miles run
1 quasi-weight training
2 comments:
Well. If I have any pull with the Running Gods, I will use it. You deserve to do well in Boston, very, very well.
Now. How to get you to chill? You probably should ask someone who actually has that ability...that would not be me.
Let me know if you can figure it out!
E
I haven't booked a hotel, don't realy have a time I'm hoping to complete it in. Nano will be left out, short sleeves and shorts to wear.Driving in to Boston on Sunday to go to the expo and have pasta at my nephews house. I'm not going to sweat anyhting, its boston and i'm going to enjoy it! Pittsburgh with my firefighter friends is something that I'm really looking forward to. Keep writing and keep training, I enjoy your work! John Carboni runnindownadream;j@gmail.com
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